A sons message

My dear friend Carol agreed for us to share this message with you. You see August 2017 Carol lost her precious child, and so many of us lost a dear beautiful friend. Clayton was very shy (until he got to know you) but also one of the brightest faces that could light up the room. Clayton was an exceptional artist and a fantastic writer.

I personally know there isn’t a day that goes by that Clayton isn’t on the mind and in the heart of Carol and Clayton’s sister Taya.

For a little back story. Clayton was bright, handsome and very charming. But like many other young people in the LGBTQ community, he most always felt like he didn’t fit in. To this day I remember hauntingly Clayton telling me “I don’t belong anywhere in this world”.

Clayton’s world was his family. Sure he has many friends, but he still felt isolated and alone. This is one of his prose when I asked Carol if I could share Clayton with you, this was her response. “Yes, it will let people know. That Suicide is something that they are not going to tell you what they are going to do and when. 💜🫂”.

You're Never On Your Own

By Clayton Rees

I set under the big emerald tree.

Just he and in an open field expending as for as the eyes can see. The tree swaying to the wind of His love and mercy.

I glanced to the sky, it's beautiful colors of pink and orange. Blended together like the waves of the ocean. A smile developed upon my new face. So happy and pure. So loving, joyful, and holly. Like I was an angel now. Because I was.

I looked at the journey in my right hand, a pen in the other. A long- written letter to a woman I'd re-connected with one day at the gates.

At the top it read "Mother".

Below were paragraphs followed by more paragraphs telling her exactly how my heart felt about her perfect loving soul exactly how my heart felt about her perfect, loving soul.

I may have been in a better world but that didn't prevent the tears from developing.

A warm hand place itself gently on my shoulder sending compassion and love through my veins to my heart. I wiped the tears from my cheek and rose my eyes to meet His.

They glowed with beauty as blue as a sapphire diamond then he opened his mouth and said do you want to see her his voice so peralyeing like a harmony.

I nodded and Rose to my feet to meet Him. Placed my hands in His and responded to my Lord's words. "Yes, I would love to see her! I yelled like child.

He smiled and led me across the field of cotton candy yellow clouds he then knelt over took His hands and open the clouds like a window.

"Take a look." He said with excitement. Quickly I got down beside him and looked through the window.

Below set my grandparents house still standing strong after all these years and then I look closer,they were there. My whole family. Mom, Taya, Aunt Bee Uncle Biff Jeanna Nate Daniel and Aunt Teresa, Jean Uncle Chris Tammy and Cody and Pap.

Under that summer sun having a big family cookout. Smiles upon their faces living life like they were meant to.

And that's when I noticed mom, sitting on the swing, all alone Eyes stuck on the floor. A sence of joy no longer knowing how to develope within.

I looked at God and He looked at me. Seeing in my eyes that I was sorry for leaving those who love me and even when I didn't see it.

"If you want to speak to her you may and even though she won't hear your words she'll fill them in her. "He said placing His hands over my heart. I placed my hands over His hands. "Yes my Lord I have something to tell her."

My wings lowerd me down onto earth down into the world I was desperate to leave. Down into the world that held futures for me But I gave them all away for a life that would understand me. A life I could smile in for Forever.

I lowered myself beside the woman that gave me life for the Lord. Rested my hands down upon her lap. And put my lips to her ear. " I love you Mom, and I'll be watching over you till the day our Lord reunites us. And remember one thing you're never on your own."

With our admiration and love Clayton, you’ll forever be with us.